Last night, I had a rough encounter with the enemy. Starting with yesterday afternoon, I had slowly started to notice an edge to my spirit. A little more snappy, a little more sassy, a little too much sarcasm and bite than necessary. Co-workers noticed it, my wife noticed it, my daughter noticed it and yet….I did nothing. I tried to just cheer up, calm down, and keep moving forward.
It is amazing to me that I had this reaction to this type of struggle. I mean, I used to run to the prayer closet quickly and get some medicine, but this day I simply sulked and pressed forward.
Have you had times like these? I’m sure you have.
What is your reaction like?
Well nevertheless, by the end of the night when exhaustion intersected with sulk, that is when it was apparent to me that something wasn’t right. Lariza turned to inquire what was going on today and I couldn’t put my finger on it. I didn’t know what to tell her. I knew that I was tired, but there was no reason I could think of to be crabby. I had just recently met with a volunteer, who even if only for a short while, seemed highly capable and willing to serve, which lightens a heavy load I carry on a weekly basis. I say that to say that there was a present hope of an easier week than usual. However, that was not the prevailing feeling. The feeling was a subtle bitterness.
BITTERNESS. Realizing that was the word to describe it was a light bulb going off.
I WAS bitter. I had internalized an issue with something that happened with Lariza on Sunday and never dealt with it. Knowing that it wasn’t fully her fault, and not wanting to blame her I let it go. But NEVER “let it go.”
It is funny how we can often let something go, so to speak, but it linger like a foul odor until we properly dispose of it.
So here I was now confronted with this bitterness and realizing that I need to do something about it.
So we talked.
No resolution was made but sincere emotions were shared, cards were on the table, and love remained.
However, my emotion was not removed. It was at this moment when I almsot sulked myself into sleep. Still mentally turning over what was discussed and how I could move forward peaceably, I hopped up out of bed and determined to get with Jesus.
That was the difference maker. God’s word soothes…heals…speaks truth… corrects…encourages…
My daddy was there. My friend was there. My comforter was there.
Can I just encourage you for a moment?
Don’t just get slapped around by the enemy. Don’t let your emotions run you around.
Don’t let hardness rule your heart. Don’t let bitterness poison you.
YOU have a God that knows you. You have a God that loves you. You have a God that wants to TAKE ALL those burdens.
Go to HIM. GO NOW! Jesus died so you could come! Why wait? There are so many things that we rush off to…
Why not hop out of your circumstance and into His arms? Why not roll away from your worries and into His rest?
RUSH INTO JESUS!!